Self care when depression makes you random

- October 31, 2024

Scattered. Discursive. Aimless. Rambling.

Has depression ever refused to let your mind settle? Has it ever made you physically and/or emotionally hyperactive? Do you find it hard to rest, impossible to meditate? Will your thoughts just not leave you alone?

Of course, you'll say. This is a common manifestation of depression experienced by most sufferers. Often it is hard to find something that holds your attention for very long. You may find yourself flitting from one task to another, unable to concentrate well or getting bored quickly. You get distracted easily. You forget things. It can be at the very least unproductive, and at the worst, a dangerous state to be in.

Anhedonia. That is a word I learned for when you have lost interest in things that you used to love doing, mainly due to ongoing depression. It is one of the most shocking, unexpected side effects of depression I've experienced over the last ten years. For me, I never thought I would stop reading. It came as a surprise that as my depression progressed, so did an inability to find the same immersive pleasure in reading that was once second nature to me. I rarely finished books, and kept jumping from one to the next, seeking the joy I once effortlessly experienced. Now I rarely start them.

I have found through hard work and therapy, a few things that help when you find yourself in a state of discursive depression. When your mind and body won't settle down, there are strategies that most times bring some relief. They are not easy to do mind you. Your depression will tell you that you cannot do them and why bother. Try a few anyway. They work better the more of them you combine.

1. Exercise - particularly walking. Take a brisk walk of at least ten minutes, Better at fifteen or even twenty minutes. Even a moderate speed walk will do. If you can't go outside, walk inside. Put on a Youtube walking exercise video and just do the moves for no less than ten minutes. Trust me you will feel better, and it could help you to sleep better at night.

2. Journaling. Blogging, writing a poem if that's your thing, just writing random words onto a page. Any of these can really help to empty an over filled mind. Take it from someone who it took months of doctor's advice to convince - the physical symptoms you feel can be alleviated by finding an outlet to express your thoughts. Pour them out onto paper, or screen or even by vlogging. Whatever works for you, find a way to express what is burning in your brain.

3. Drink water. You can become dehydrated easily. Keep sipping water throughout the day, it will help your body stay in balance and you will feel better.

4. Distraction. So meditation doesn't help because you just keep ruminating on your troubles. Fine, distract yourself with a task that fully engages your mind and body. For me it was simply going back out to work after a period of debilitating depression. The first three days back I was sure I couldn't make it...I had physical symptoms that felt like a medical emergency. But I pushed through them. And as it turned out, the distraction of work kept me from thinking of my illness, and gradually, my symptoms started waning.

I'm not advocating working when you shouldn't. If you are in crisis then you may not be able to work at all, as I wasn't for a time. But find something, some task, that is so absorbing and preferably significant, that it takes your mind away from yourself, even just for a while. You will notice that during those times your mind will behave itself a lot better. It comes as a relief.

5. Relax. Give yourself a facial. A sheet mask is an easy way to do it. Just put it on your face. Do your nails. Get a foot massager and let it massage your feet. Lie on a heated blanket. Use easy tools to help yourself relax even when you don't want to. They make a difference and you may end up with better skin and less muscle tension, if nothing else.

6. Take a warm shower or bath. I love the feeling of warm water falling on my back and have found it to be surprisingly therapeutic when I feel nervous and can't calm down.

I have found these techniques beneficial even when at my most jittery. They take little thought or preparation, and really do help to soothe frayed nerves. The key is not to think too much. Just recognize the mood, pick a few of these self-care activities, and do them. Practice makes perfect, but over time we may just find the ability to manage our scattered-squirrel brains a bit better.

Now, breathe with me...